winter is pretending to be over.  idle wishes
manifest, the frogs are mating in the pond
you can hear them singing.
lilacs are budded out, snowdrops
blooming in the hard-packed leaves
left by the snow plow.

lichens are claiming the balcony.
i have come back to myself, now
that the rags of march have unraveled
and blown away like the prayer flags
at the base camp of mount everest.
the locust tree shakes against the wind,

trying to hurry its buds. if you were here--
any one of you-- i would hold you in my arms
until storm winds snuffed out the flames.
i could never figure out why you--or you--or you
ever even bothered with me, surrounded
as you were by beautiful women

nevertheless, days i loved you, whoever you were.
nights i dreamed of going away,
far away from the need i knew you'd discard
far away from the brutal endings

i always knew would come